How to Connect With Your Shy International Student

Most students are fairly adaptable and tend to blend into everyday family life very well. I have, however, in my hosting time, had 2 students who are Extremely shy, and I would almost say that they experience social anxiety when in the family environment.

Trang was one of our students who connected really well with our children. She also loved hot sauce on her food.

This is how I supported them to feel as comfortable as possible in our home.

Flexible Lines of Communication

I usually encourage face to face communication with my students as it is good for them to practice their english skills. However with my shy students I encourage them to text me. especially in the beginning.

I prefer them to reach out to me in some capacity, rather than feeling worried or nervous which can lead to isolation and depression. Once the relationship is established, and they feel more comfortable the face to face conversation happens in its own time.

Don’t Push Them

At dinner we usually say grace, the kids have a song they sing to do this, and often our students join in. Later during the meal we share what we are grateful for, usually we go around the table. When I have a shy student I make all this optional and avoid putting anyone on the spot.

Bite Size Steps

I often break dinner up into sittings. This happens from time to time with a big family anyway, and a husband who often works late. I have my shy student eat with Just my daughters, or my tired husband who is happy to have minor conversations after a big day at work. This way they stay connected with the family in a more relaxed environment. It’s a better option (in my opinion) than eating their meal once everyone has gone to bed by themselves..

Games, Games, Games,

Games are fun and a way we can engage socially in a light hearted way. We also encourage them to join in when we are doing a relax activity like colouring or craft.

Check In Regularly

Be available and check in regularly. Sometimes it is only when I check in, that they tell me they aren’t doing great or are struggling with something. It’s so important to initiate this otherwise I might never have know.

The More the Merrier

The more the merrier, as they say, I like to encourage our students to invite their friends to come over. Or, for their friends to join us if we are going out. It’s always more fun if you have a friend with you, and can make the outing less intense.

I find that some people like to keep to themselves and a big family like ours can be overwhelming. As long as they know they are welcome to join us and they feel comfortable to talk if they need too, I don’t push them too much.

what strategy do you have to connect with a person who is more shy in nature?