Why being a host parent isn’t as hard as you think!

Sometimes we can really overthink stuff. One thing I know people could overthink, and talk themselves out of very quickly, is being a homestay parent. When I share that I am a homestay parent, often to 2 or 3 students at a time, as well as a parent to my own 4 children, people are amazed and I am almost always met with MANY comments and questions…

Ari’s 4th birthday party at his grandparents house. We took 3 of our international homestay students with us to Yorke Peninsula. 2 German students and 1 Japanese student. One of the German students made his cake for him. Thanks Merle.

So for the sake of this blog post, I will share what these questions and comments are and why they shouldn’t put you off hosting an international student yourself.

I couldn’t handle having a stranger in my house, it would be hard to relax, I would feel like I never get to unwind or relax.

We find the first week or two with a new student to be the most busy. It takes extra time to try and navigate a new person in your home. You are just getting to know each other and for them, its even harder, as they are learning to live in a family home that has completely different cultural norms than what they are used too, plus they also have to dance around your individual family routine.

Down time definitely happen though. We let our students know our expectations early on. However, for us, it hasn’t been a problem because we find our students are generally always tired after school, they have homework to do, family to connect with back home, not to mention friends to chat with online etc. many have had sporting commitments as well. we find that, just like a typical Aussie teenager, they value their space, as much as you value yours.

As long as they know the boundaries of your home and your routine, you shouldn’t have a problem with this.

For us, once our kids are in bed, our students can have a bit of our time if they need help with something, but other than that we make it clear that it is our time to use the lounge room as we have very important Netflix binging to attend too.

Is it really worth it though? I mean with the cost of living, food etc it mustn’t leave you with much.

Yes it is worth it, well for me it is. I am by nature very frugal, and if you are too, you shouldn’t have a problem..

It has been my goal to be a stay at home mum for as long as possible and in the current climate, it isn’t an easy feat. As a family we budget regularly, review Our family values, so we know exactly where our money is going.

I aim to write some blog post on how you can keep costs down at the checkout and in the home, so please keep your eyes open for these, as I know they will help you out!

Taco night is popular with all our students. It is a budget meal, but very healthy. This photo is of our 3 students when we told them that the “meat” part of the taco was kangaroo meat.

Do you have to take them out and entertain them every weekend? That could get exhausting and expensive.

No, not every weekend, that WOULD get exhausting. However it is fun to show them around Adelaide. I will be compiling a few day trip itineraries that have been popular with our students, please keep an eye out for these in the not so distant future.

You don’t need to plan huge day trip with a jam packed itinerary (unless you want too). often they want to just spend time with YOU and your family. It’s best to keep it simple. I also find, that once they get settled in and make friends, they tend to spend their free time with them.

We always take our new students to the Big Rocking Horse in Gummeracha, in the Adelaide Hills. It is a fun, family day out, that is budget friendly with some great photo opportunities for them.

Do you have to drive them to school and out and about on weekends?

Generally speaking no, however sometimes a ‘short stay study tour’ may require you to take your student to school and pick them up afterwards.

I have always made time to sit down with my students, in the first few days, to help them get their head around Adelaide on google maps and the public transport system we have here. I ensure they have the bus or train timetables they need and I have a good conversation with them about how to get to school and how to get home.

We also exchange phone numbers and email addresses so I can contact them during their time with us.

Often I will go with them on the bus (depending on each individual student and how confident they are), on the first day or two, after that, they are more than capable to get themselves around on our public transport system.

We started hosting students, as a family when Hannah was about 4 years old.

I have heard they can have really long showers.

So can I, but personally, I much prefer a long hot soak in the bath.

However this one is easy to overcome with clear communication, in fact I think they are told something before they come to Australia because almost all of my students ask me how long they can spend in the shower.

Also make sure you specify shower and bathroom times seperately. In our house, showering time is generally 5 minutes, however they can spend as long as they like in the bathroom, because we have a bathroom specifically for our students.

If your student shares the family bathroom, maybe let them know what time they can have the bathroom (e.g. between 7-8pm) because your kids have had their baths by then.

Just work it in with your families routine and you will be fine.

Mai was our Japanese student who stayed with us when our baby Micah was born. It was a special time for our family and it was lovely to see our students bond with our new baby also. They also were more than happy to help me and gave us some beautiful gifts.

I sometimes loose it with my kids (and my husband), I might find it embarrassing to do this in front of a student.

This used to bother me too, although I am not much of a “yeller” , I can from time to time completely flip my lid with my kids. If I do this, I will usually apologise to my kids afterwards anyway, I will just extend this apology to my student also.

I must say I have used it as a personal challenge for me to practice my own self control. We are all human and we all have bad days. as long as we apologise and repair relationships afterwards, there’s not much more you can ask for.

Final thoughts for now…

You do find your groove, and they do too, in a way our students become apart of your family, in the sense that is is easy and comfortable with them around.

I really do find communication is key and if you feel uncomfortable speaking about an issue face to face, you can always text them,

Yes, even if they are just in another room, it is quite normal to communicate electronically with young people less than 50m from you ….

So these are probably the main questions I get asked the most. I am happy to answer other questions you may have, please just flick me an email or message through my blog..

I am passionate about seeing more young families becoming host families to international students, because I believe both student and families are able to benefit greatly from it in many ways..

If hosting an international student sounds like something that could work for your family, you can click on the link below to learn more:

https://www.homestaynetwork.org/partner-not-so-stay-at-home-mum/

saying goodbye to Klara, one of the last Japanese students we had before we set off on our Adventure around Australia.